Essential FAQs on Family Constellations

Family Constellations is a method that helps you to heal inherited family trauma and difficult emotions. It allows you to get right to the root of dysfunctional family patterns that continue to replay in your family system, body, relationships and life.

It is a therapeutic approach that seeks to identify and resolve emotional and psychological issues within a family system. It was developed by German psychotherapist Bert Hellinger and is based on the idea that a person’s problems can be caused by hidden dynamics and unresolved issues within their family system. The approach involves the use of a facilitator and “representatives” or stand-ins to help identify and resolve these issues. The goal is to bring balance and harmony to the family system and to help individuals heal from past traumas and emotional wounds.

It is a very powerful solution-focused process that reveals unconscious entanglements that we have with our family of origin which affects us in today’s life. Once these hidden dynamics are brought to our conscious awareness, they are shifted and we feel a sense of freedom from issues that were holding us back before.

Family Constellations is inexplicable. It is something that needs to be experienced.

There are mainly 2 ways of setting up a constellation.

1. Individual sessions: in this case you and I work together privately on your issue using figurines to represent your family members and system. 
2. Group sessions: in this case, we work as a group using others as representatives of your family members.

Family constellations is a therapeutic approach that aims to uncover and resolve hidden dynamics within a person’s family system. The facilitator guides participants through a process of representing their family members through themselves and other participants. The goal is to identify and resolve unconscious patterns and traumas that may be affecting the individual in the present, often stemming from past generations. This is said to allow the individual to access a deeper understanding of their family history, and to find a sense of peace and understanding.

When we set up a constellation, the seeker (issue holder) will briefly state the issue they want to work on and heal, without getting into their story about why or how it happened. He or she will be asked to choose representatives (or figurines) of family members or aspects of the issue and place them spatially in relation to one another according to what feels right to them in the resonance field.

Both sessions can be done online or in person.

In an individual session, you as the seeker and I as the facilitator will work together to experience feelings and sensations coming from your family system. There will be emotions and movements that will urge seeking healing coming from the soul of your family.

In a group session, representatives will stand in as the family members or aspects of an issue and after a while, they will begin to experience feelings, sensations or urges to move that are coming from the seeker’s family system and through them. They simply connect to the resonance energy field of the seeker’s family, or the family soul and allow themselves to flow with what emerges. This is very useful in order to illuminate hidden dynamics that the seeker is entangled with and move towards the solution.

In both sessions, we will discover hidden family dynamics and work on a lot of healing.

During a family constellations session, I as the facilitator will guide you as the seeker or the group through a process of representing your family members through yourself and other participants (or figurines). The individuals will be chosen by me or the seeker to represent a specific family member, such as a parent or grandparent.

I will direct the representatives to physically stand or sit in certain positions to represent the family members and their relationships. I will also ask questions and make observations about the positions and movements of the representatives, in order to identify any patterns or dynamics that may be causing problems for the seeker.

As the session progresses, I may also guide the representatives through a process of resolving any identified issues, such as by having them move to new positions or speak on behalf of the represented family member. I may also ask the seeker to speak or interact with the representatives in order to gain insight and understanding into their own experiences.

A Family Constellations session typically lasts between 90 minutes to 2 hours. However, the length of a session can vary depending on the specific situation and the needs of the individual or group.

In general, individual constellation sessions take approximately 1h30 to up to 2 hours. 

A constellation in groups may take anywhere from around 30 minutes to 1h30. In addition, group sessions can have additional topics and systemic exercises to be covered.

Family Constellations is the science of our relationships, the benefits of it include:

• Understanding the root cause of emotional issues
• Resolving emotional blockages
• Improving family relationships
• Improving love relationships
• Helping with professional conflicts
• Helping with career
• Understanding the financial situation
• Understanding health and addiction problems
• Improving self-esteem and overall well-being

This is a very common question. Everyone has their own time to process what is been revealed in a session.

The frequency of family constellation sessions depends on the seeker’s needs and goals. Some people may only need one or two sessions to resolve a specific issue, while others may need ongoing sessions to continue working through deeper issues.

When a constellation is set up for you, it takes time for you to integrate the full effects, which can vary between seekers. Therefore, it is recommended that you allow this to happen without interrupting the process. This is going to happen in the soul of the family system.

I would recommend that you wait in general a month before setting up another constellation. If you would like to deepen your process, it is recommended that you participate in as many workshops as you feel drawn to as an observer or a representative. Constellations in groups do not just benefit the issue holder, but the entire group present including ALL participants. You and I together can discuss the best approach depending on your needs and goals.

It is also important to consider that Family constellations is not a substitute for medical treatment and that it is best to consult with a licensed therapist or a medical professional if you have any questions or concerns regarding your mental or physical health.

Both group and individual family constellation sessions can be intense and effective, and the choice between them depends on your needs and preferences.

Group sessions can be beneficial because they allow seekers and participants to see how their issues may be connected to the experiences of others. They can also provide a sense of support and validation as we all see that we are not alone in our struggles. Group sessions are also often less expensive than individual sessions.

On the other hand, individual sessions provide a more focused and personalized experience. It allows you to delve deeper into your specific issues and work through them at your own pace. Individual sessions also provide more privacy, which can be important for some people.

You can talk with me to discuss the best option that will be the most beneficial for you and your goals.

However, if you never had experienced it before and want to know more about it before doing your own session, I would recommend attending Family Constellations in a group setting. By observing and representing a role in others’ constellations you begin to make shifts and gain insights that will allow you to deepen your own constellation in the future, whether in a group or in private.

Either in a group or individually, we all commit to confidentiality.

No, you do not.

It is not necessary to have detailed knowledge of your family history to participate in family constellation sessions. I will guide you through the process of uncovering and exploring any issues that may be related to your family history. However, having some basic information about your family and their experiences can be helpful in understanding how they may be impacting your emotional and psychological well-being.

During the session, I may ask you about your family history and any specific issues or concerns you may have. I will use representatives/figurines or other objects to represent different family members and help you connect with them emotionally. 

All the information we need is within you and emerges through the representatives or figurines, who connect with your family field during this process.

You also do not need to know your relative, in case you had never met them (i.e. your birth parents).

After a family constellation session, it is important to take some time to reflect on the experience and integrate any new insights or understanding that you may have gained. The below recommendations can help the work to have its greatest effects.

Here are a few things that you can do:

• Do not go deeper over the step-by-step of your constellation; in doing so you will try to interpret them by analyzing what happened and this work goes far beyond the realm of the mind.
• Instead, reflect on your feelings and emotions: think about how you felt during the session and what emotions came up for you.
• In the upcoming days, write down your thoughts and insights: writing down your thoughts can help you process and integrate the information that you received during the session.
• Avoid talking about the steps of your own constellation to others as this may dilute the soul work done. Wait at least 30 days if you feel the urge to talk about it.
• Keep the last image observed in your heart as a seed that has been planted within you and will grow with time.
• Practice self-care: take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. Engage in activities that bring you relaxation and joy, and that make you feel good.
• Trust that you got what you needed and were ready for and that you picked the right facilitator and experience for you.
• If the facilitator has suggested you do some activity after the constellation, focus on it with the intention that was mentioned for you and honour the process.
• Follow up with your facilitator: talk to your facilitator about your experience and ask any questions that you may have.
• It is also important to discuss with the facilitator what are the best strategies for you to integrate the insights gained from the session, and also to consider that it is not a substitute for medical treatment and that it is best to consult with a licensed therapist or a medical professional if you have any questions or concerns regarding your mental or physical health.
• Seek other forms of support: depending on the issues you are dealing with, you may also benefit from other forms of therapy, counselling, or support groups.
• Allow for time to integrate what has been experienced. Hellinger has mentioned that sometimes constellations take up to two years for its full effect.
• Allow yourself to feel and release the emotions that come up after a constellation. For a while, after a constellation, some people may feel worse, before feeling better. A lot of emotions and insights will come up after the session.
• Do not set up another constellation right away. Although it is beneficial to participate in group sessions and represent or observe, it is advised that you wait some time before setting up another constellation. In general, I would recommend doing it after 30 days, but we can discuss the best approach depending on each seeker’s goals and needs.
• If your constellation has not reached a “happy ending” do not think it did not work. Constellations will continue to process through time at the level of the soul and sometimes a constellation that seems unresolved will generate the strength you need to continue the process in your healing journey.

Sometimes is not what our minds want that makes us feel better, but what our souls desire.